Capn Design

TV Reviews


No, this is not a reference to a sexual fetish for X-boxes. Instead it is a critique of the new Tech TV show, X-Play. This show replaces Extended Play, which was Tech TV's last video game show.

Essentially, this is a more annoying version of the original. They still have a whole bunch of reviews crammed into 30 minutes, but they have added Morgan Webb as a host and a lot bunch of schlocky nonesense. Adam Sessler is now zanier and there are a lot of dumb jokes between reviews. They just did a segment where Adam had to enter cheat codes in his "real life" to help him get ladies. It was painful. On top of this all, the graphics are worse and they have the horrible black and white, behind the scenes, secondary camera. This may be the most annoying thing you could possibly do. Also, I like Morgan, but there is no need for her.

This is clearly the same exact show geared towards a younger audience. Overall, pretty dumb if you ask me.*

*Despite the dumbness, I will still TiVo this to watch the reviews. I'll just skip through the crappy parts.

Joe Millionare

I told myself I would only watch the final episode. I lied. I have watched the last 4 or so and I feel swindled. The last two episodes, and next week's as well, are gratuitiously milking the viewing public's desire to see what happens next. In the last 3 hours of programming, we have learned two new things. Joe picked Zora and they got $1 million. Big whoop.

The editing of this show was hilarious and the personalitites were fun to watch, but Fox reminded me why I don't like watching reality shows (with the obvious exception of American Idol).

American Idol 2: ep. 3

You can take forever and shove it up your ass. The girl who wrote/sang that song was fine, but the title is amazing. Tonight was a lot more of the same, which is fine. Still, I'm glad that tomorrow's episode moves onto a new phase of the show.

In other news, Ryan Seacrest is so much better without Dunkelman. At first I was upset Dunkelman is gone, cuz it's great to make fun of him, but now it's just fine. Seacrest is more than tolerable, he's entertaining. Good call Fox.

That's all the commentary for today. More drama tomorrow night.

American Idol 2: Ep. 2

I waited a little too long to write this, so I will have forgotten all of the funny parts. Nonetheless, here goes. The second one, I think, was even funnier than the first one. These first episodes don't have a whole lot of drama, but they are ridiculously funny. I don't know how I feel about this tactic as the rest of the show will be less like "America's Funniest Home Videos" and more like "Survivor," or something. And although they'll get a lot of people watching these first few episodes it isn't what's going to hook them. Last summer people started filling in after the drama began. The big difference is that all of those people are back this time, for better or worse.

So this episode had a lot of horrible singing and hillarious attempts, but there were a couple people who will definitely be moving on. First, I think that the guy who was dressed in black and was slightly balding is going to go really far. He was the one that made Simon go, "Thank You God." He was a great singer and had a very likeable personality. I see him making it to the Top 5.

This reminds me of something else, do you think that this is rigged at all? I mean, last season a few stinkers got through when there were amazing singers biting the dust. It's also weird how the amount of talent really hasn't increased much this year. You would think that a whole lot of hidden talent would surface after the popularity of the first season. I guess time will tell for that question.

Next we have one more week of hilarity, and then it's on to some serious drama.

American Idol 2: ep. 1

Welcome back to the most entertaining reality show on television. The usual cast of characters have returned, except for the best dude to make fun of, Brian Dunkelman, but I'll survive. Last night was a brilliant return as we got to see thousands of people attempt to hold a note. The best of the bunch was the guy in Miami who sang the Enrique Iglesias. After first claiming he would win the show he sang what could possibly be the worst rendition of his song. After arguing with Simon for about a minute he finally gave up and walked out. He then tried to convince the support staff that the judges had asked him to come back and try again, but he was snubbed. My other favorite was the man that Simon claimed was "the worst singer in America." He was sent out to find someone who was a worse singer than he was, but he couldn't do it. It was hilarious.

In the end, the show is not innovating any more than it was last summer. Simon Fuller has a great formula and there is no reason to mess with it. I'm just curious to see what kind of scandals will be arising throughout this season. There will definitely be another blowout between Simon and someone. I think it's funny how few people can take really harsh criticism. I know that this is what they love to do, but they should be able to understand that they are certainly not perfect. So kudos to Simon for telling it like it is.

That's about all there is to say about this week. More drama will ensue once we get a more stable cast of characters. You just wait.

Journeys with George

This is the documentary about George W. Bush's campaign for presidency. I'll tell you the ending: he wins. Ha ha.

The movie tells you everything you'd expect to hear about W. He is charismatic, relatively dim-witted, likes to shake hands and tends to avoid important questions. What's nice is that the story is well told. Alexandra, the narrator and director, is very charismatic. She lets the story tell itself, ocassionally interjecting personal notes to keep things entertaining. You realize this is necessary, as there is not enough interesting Bush footage to fill the full 75 minutes. So instead of just getting a story about GW, you also get to live behind the scenes of a press core following a presidential candidate. It's not pretty.

It is a treat to get to see a president grow up (note: this doesn't mean he has finished growing up). Usually you only see what his PR people want you to see, and this gives a chance to see some more. It would be perfect if the documentary had uncovered some unknown political views, but you can't get everything.

Good Morning, Miami

Stay far away. Really. I watched it the first week and it was one of the worst shows I've seen in a while. Imagine Sports Night, but with bad writing, bad plots, bad characters, bad everything. The girl was kind of cute though.

Celebrity Bootcamp

Fox: "Hi, this is Sally Payar calling from Fox. We were cleaning out our, casting for a new show and we were wondering if you're interested."

Washed-up actor: "Hmm, ok. What's the show?"

Fox: "Great, see you monday." [Click]

WUA: "Huh? Sweet, work."


A really good show. It's a cop show that, of course, has its own twist. The difference is, this one is interesting. TV Barn points out that the style is somewhat similar to a popular documentary format, where the show follows the plot through the eyes of 4 or 5 people, instead of the typical one man action. Everything is neatly woven together. Aside from gimmicks, this show has some quality acting and interesting plotlines. I'll be watching again next week.

ESPN Football

Easily the best football game coverage (this is aside from Sportscenter, which is easily the best). They have great camerawork and great announcing. The stats and such are nonobtrusive and I just like the feel of it. Too bad the NFL won't sell them the rights to show more games.

Fox Football

Man, they have sucked this year. There have been about 5 times this season where the camera would follow the QB, he would throw it and the camera wouldn't move at all. I'm not sure if this is a problem with the director or the cameraman, but it is unacceptable. I want to see all of the game.

Also, they were dumb to drop Pat Sumerall from the big games. He kept Madden in check. I love Madden's videogame but I think he is a bonafide nutcase these days.

American Idol

Obviously, I loved this show. I'm just depressed that Ryan Starr left the show early. Thankfully, Justin lost to Kelly. Anyway, this is the first reality show I've really enjoyed. Way to go Fox.

NBA Playoffs

Call me a fair-weather fan if you'd like, but I haven't really watched basketball since MJ left the Bulls. But today, while I was sitting at home being sick, I caught the end of the Mavs-Kings game and remembered that the end of basketball games are more exciting than any other sport. The intensity's always high, there's a lot of visible emotion and there's a great chance for things to change quickly. But, sports are never as exciting when your team sucks.

I'm pretty sure I'll still watch, but I'll never love again.

New Snapple Ads

The new ads depict bottles of Snapple (dressed as humans) in compromising situations. The ads are great, but what makes the whole thing funny is the amount of money Snapple spent to make the ads look lo-fi. They spent $40 million to make bottles look like they are throwing a party or making out. I want to work for this company.

Greg the Bunny

The new replacement for Sifl & Olly in the world of odd puppet shows. Nonetheless, I think this is one of my new favorite comedies blah. I will watch it whenever it is on and I am here blah.

Andy Richter Controls the Universe

The show is definitely really funny, but I wouldn't say it's hillarious. I like how Andy makes an incredibly clear depiction of how the average male's mind really works. There is a deep moral core, but it is only exercised through guilt. Brilliant. I will keep watching.