I will admit, I can be impatient. I hate going to the DMV, waiting thirty extra minutes for my doctor, and standing at the end of a Friday night Shake Shack line. You’d be smart to assume that this is why I wait until the last possible minute to merge into the exit lane, and you’d be partly right.

If that drives you nuts, you’re in good company. At the beginning of the month, New York Times’ City Room blog published a screed deriding line-cutters. Alice Dubois, the writer, basically called me scum.

The line-cutter is the most enraging species of self-entitled driver, with those using the breakdown lane representing an even more despicable subspecies. These impatient hooligans seem to be convinced that lines are for chumps, that they are too important to be inconvenienced by basic concepts of fairness like “waiting your turn.” I resent people who think nothing of avoiding irritation for themselves by making it worse for others. Their behavior demonstrates a sense of entitlement and egotism that makes my blood boil.

Many of the City Room readers agreed with Alice, but one of them linked to a study I’ve been looking for over the last few months. This study shows that “the [zipper] method speeds traffic by 20 percent and slashes the length of traffic back-ups by 35 percent.” This, my friends, is why I cut the line. I do hate waiting, but waiting actually makes things worse. It’s also why this comment from a reader makes me nuts.

This same applies for those lovely subway riders who seem to think that the train will pull away before they are able to run over the mass of poor suckers trying to get off.

I hate those guys too, but we are not the same! While I don’t have any studies to reference (except Jason’s subway rules), it’s clear that this gums up the works. In fact, henceforth this is my motto — “Try not to gum up the works.” This seems like a good rule to live by, even if your virtuous actions may occasionally frustrate onlookers.

Now, if you told me that the zipper method caused a greater delay to those not waiting to exit, I don’t think I’d stop cutting the line when I want to get onto the Brooklyn Bridge from the FDR. That line is just plain ridiculous.