That's it. I've had it. Twice now, I've been a victim of sexism and I'm not gonna take it any more. Granted, the sexism has been relatively tame and has only been an annoyance, but it's time I shared my problem with the world.
For the second time in the last six months or so, I have been forced to check my bag. The first time, I was at a Yankees game and they told me I couldn't bring my bag into the stadium. I complained as I saw women carrying similarly sized bags through the gates with no problem. When I asked a security guard why I couldn't bring my bag in, he explained that purses are allowed but bags are not. I told him my bag was a purse and he asked if I was a woman. "If being a woman means I can bring my bag in, then yes, I am a woman." That didn't work.
Tonight I went to see the Stills at Irving Plaza with my friend/co-worker Elana. When I entered, the security guard told me I needed to check my bag. I told him that I didn't want to, but he didn't seem to care. I pointed out that Elana's bag was the exact same size as mine.
"Why can she bring her bag in but I cannot?"
"She's a girl. They have...personal issues."
"I have personal issues."
"No, I mean, they have monthly issues. They bleed."
"Now this I want to see."
The man leveled with me and told me that he couldn't let me bring my bag in and it wasn't his rule. He was nice enough to have the coat check guy comp my bag. That was nice, but I was still miffed.
In this age of metrosexuality, why can't a man carry a murse (man purse) around with him? Is the fact that I lack the need or ability to menstruate enough to keep me from having my books, magazines and iPod at the ready? Clearly, I think not. It's time for equal bag rights. I want to keep my bag at my side and you don't need to know why. It's my man purse, God dammit, and you can't take it from me.
If this doesn't let up soon I am going to boycott institutions that don't allow murses. Myself and all the other downtrodden and afflicted shall take to the streets and from the depths of our bellies we shall chant our war cry, "We don't want to curse, now give me back my murse!"
Although I am being a bit melodramatic, I do think this is a very silly rule. I don't mind if ladies have their bags but I see no reason why I can't have mine.