Over the last few weeks I have become a regular at Sharkey's Sports Bar & Grill. I am rather obsessed with the Chicago Bears and it is impossible to watch the games at home, so I go to Sharkey's.

It's exactly what you'd expect from a sports bar on NFL Sundays; there are dudes in team jerseys, 10 televisions and both kinds of waitresses -- the young cute ones and the older motherly ones. This week was a bit tame but in the past there were a group of regulars who would yell every 5 minutes and make up songs using players' or teams' names (for Joe Horn, "Oh me so horny, oh me so horny," and so on). Despite their absence, I was able to be entertained by a couple of incredibly typical dudes. As they watched games and knocked back brewskis, one of them made two choice comments:

  1. "I need to date a lesbian couple before I die."
  2. "Dude, you can comment on their eyes or their smile, but not their tits! What's the difference?!?"
There was absolutely no sarcasm involved, unforntunately.

Obviously, the place is entertaining from a sociological standpoint, but the reason I keep going back is because I can watch every football game at once. Oh, and they have a mean chicken parmigiana sandwich.