America v2.0

June 13, 2002

One of my favorite little weblogs suggested 10 ways to improve the US. Here are a couple highlights.

4. Keep disliking the French. They're so damn irritating and only the French like the French. Keep importing and mispronouncing croissant (i.e. kras-sant). Yummy.

8. Give the Statue of Liberty to U2 for use in their next world tour. Take that American Flag lined jacket away from Bono, cause he's about to trade up and it's not a good idea to have a national symbol being sweat upon. Throw in the Ghostbusters, from the second movie, as an added bonus.

10. Demolish the American two-party political system. Instead, push for as many different parties as possible with a target of, say, thirty-two. Instead of voting on "Election Day" have Simon Cowell create a new television show called 'Presidential Idol' whereby the nominees are stranded in Iowa and have to survive without soft money, BBQs, or campaign staff. Cross fingers for a total Lord of the Flies style showdown.

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